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    1. well does duration help? I only farted 5 times but like… One lasted for OVER 15 seconds and had to cut that shit off before it got dangerous… So I must be on my way to meeting my weight loss goals!

    2. My nick name was the ripper and have a picture in my high school senior year book and right next to it in plain ol English “most likely to fart himself to death”

    3. So if you eat beans, you gain some calories or something like that, but then you’ll fart a lot which burns 57 so basically you eat you gain and then you will lose much more than what you gain

    4. What kinda farts are we talking about. The ones where you cropdust someone in the produce isle or the ones where you need to find somewhere private because you're not sure what's gonna happen?

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