Taylor Swift’s The Life of a Showgirl review: Penis metaphors and poor little rich girl tales start to chafe

I appreciate that they’re ripping her a new one, but I still feel like I’m being gaslit by everyone insisting that Nevermore and Folklore were these landmark albums. Swift has never actually been a strong lyricist; we’ve just let a bunch of high schoolers whose only point of reference is Rupi Kaur tell us that she is.

I don’t hate this album as much as TTPD but it has no staying power for me. I like Opalite and Cancelled! but I was on a second listen of the album and already forgot the majority of the songs.

The problem with the album is nothing feels authentic. Even Cancelled, while fun, rings hollow when she’s a notorious friend ditcher. Blake Lively has certainly been “cancelled” and I don’t see paparazzi pics of them popping around town. She might like her friends canceled but she certainly doesn’t liked her canceled friends.

https://preview.redd.it/9grp0hq6swsf1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4aa8f400e1fbb135c5870fcedd408a6bc0d77336

pulling from a pop culture shitpost compilation I saved (we need more of those)

I don’t like her but I used to like her music. I snark on her a lot but wanted to give this a chance. I listened hoping that this would go back to the music I liked. Really gave it a chance. Kept telling myself it would get better and it was just that song. Which is ok because not every song is for every person. But then I was at the end still feeling that way. The music itself isn’t bad if you remove the lyrics. But since this isn’t an instrumental record it doesn’t work that way.

I guess folklore and evermore are truly over huh. we just have Midnights quality forever

The lyrics are insane

>He dick-matized me and opened my eyes – Redwood tree, it ain’t hard to see – His love was the key that opened my thighs


For some reason even if her album bombed, I thought that the reviews would still glorify her artistry, so I’m pleasantly surprised they’re not holding back. I wonder what Taylor is going to say about these reviews.

Bear with me. I’m going to say something that sounds unhinged but I swear I’ve thought this through.

Taylor now reminds me of JKR in how even the slightest whiff of someone not fawning over her takes up way too much space in her head.

Like, if people like Emma Watson or Dan Radcliffe say something mild about disagreeing with JKR on certain issues, JKR responds by writing paragraph upon paragraph upon paragraph.

So, this morning I was listening to Charli XCX and all she says in her song is “oh I feel so insecure and like I can’t do what Taylor does and I feel so gross about my feelings” and Taylor comes out with a whole damn song slapping down Charli.

Obviously JKR and Taylor are nothing like each other. Except I wonder if being THIS wealthy and THIS surrounded by yes people actually mess up folks who were once more empathetic than they are now?

I don’t know if this makes sense. It’s just been swirling in my head all morning how extreme fame and money can really turn you thin-skinned. And how your creative work really suffers as a result of all this?

I know people dislike her here and I get it…but I’m not gonna pretend she’s not a good lyricist, she is but her latest works are showing me what I think happens when a fandom becomes too lenient on criticism.

**folklore and evermore** are her standouts for writing, yes there are cringey lyrics but most of the songs are strong in lyrics and in execution. **midnights** is a mess but would’ve should’ve could’ve and bigger than the whole sky are again good lyrical songs. TTPD is a clunky mess but the anthology portion of it and so long London again have good lyrics.

She shouldn’t have made **TWO** albums during the eras tour, like neither truly had time to be worked on and she had so much going on. Both are considered her weakest works and she just didn’t seem to truly care and was more focused on just getting songs out there. It’s like she’s forgotten that she doesn’t have to release *everything* she writes.

I am mad because she used a concept of show girls A INSANE CREATIVE CONCEPT for a mediocre and stupid album like this. She ain’t serving anything like a showgirl like girl?? Also sad for everyone who bought all the versions of this awful album without even listening to it 

I was truly expecting a lush pop spectacle with how this album was being advertised, especially with Max attached to the project. It’s nothing new or exciting and more or less the same thing she’s been churning out