Emma Thompson On Getting Paid To Be Funny, And Feeling “Intense Irritation” Over A.I.

Emma Thompson On Getting Paid To Be Funny, And Feeling “Intense Irritation” Over A.I.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MY FIRST
GUESS TONIGHT IS A TREASURE. SHE’S A DAME, AN ACTRESS,
WRITER, CONSERVATIONIST, AND ACADEMY AWARD WINNER, AND TRULY
ONE OF THE BEST REPRESENTATIONS OF OUR SPECIES. SHE NOW STARS IN
THE SERIES “DOWN CEMETERY ROAD” “DOWN CEMETERY ROAD.” “DOWN
CEMETERY ROAD.” >> YOU THINKING WHAT I’M THINKING? >> WELL, IF
YOU’RE THINKING “WHAT IS MY HUSBAND DOING SITTING WHEN HE
COULD BE OUT LOOKING FOR JOBS” THEN YEAH, I AM. SPOOKY. >> WHAT
I WAS THINKING WAS THIS HOUSE EXPLOSION COULD BE A BIT OF A —
BIT OF A CASH GRAB. DUE DILIGENCE, MAYBE THE GAS COMPANY
DIDN’T DO IT. >> MAYBE THIS CASE COULD GO ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP.
>> MAY BE SORT OF ALL THE WAY TO THE MIDDLE. MIDDLE OF THE
BOTTLE. NO? ANYWAY, I MIGHT DO A BIT OF SNIFFING AROUND. GEICO
WHY DID YOU LAST SNIFF AROUND THESE? SPRING? >> Stephen:
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO “THE LATE SHOW,” EMMA THOMPSON! [CHEERS
AND APPLAUSE] ♪ ♪ YOU STILL GOT IT, BABY. [CHEERS
AND APPLAUSE] STILL GOT IT. YOU HAVEN’T MISSED A STEP. WAYS.
PLEASE. REFRESH YOURSELF. HYDRATE. STAY HYDRATED. YOU KNOW
I’M A FAN OF YOURS, I’M SUCH AN IN NORMA’S FAN OF YOURS, YOUR
COMEDY CHOPS AND ALL OF YOUR CHOPS. AND I WAS CURIOUS TO
REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME YOU GOT PAID TO BE FUNNY? >> I DO,
ACTUALLY. INTENSELY. BECAUSE IT WAS MY 25TH BIRTHDAY AND I WAS
DOING STAND-UP IN THE CROYDON WAREHOUSE — >> Stephen: WEARS
CROYDON? >> CROYDON, YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW. AND IT WAS A LOT
OF JOKES ABOUT MARGARET THATCHER AND HERPES, WHICH WERE BOTH VERY
BIG AT THE TIME, EQUALLY UNPLEASANT AND DIFFICULT TO GET
RID OF. AND I GOT PAID 60 QUID — POUNDS, ABOUT $6,000, I DON’T
KNOW WHAT THE EXCHANGE RATE IS. IN MY HANDS. >> Stephen: CASH?
>> CASH, IN A BROWN ENVELOPE. >> Stephen: SAME THING FOR ME.
FIRST TIME I EVER GOT PAID TO DO COMEDY WAS AT SECOND CITY, A
MONDAY NIGHT SHOW AND WE SPLIT THE HOUSE. IT WAS GREAT. BACK IN
THE GREEN ROOM WHERE THEY GIVE YOU THE GREEN. >> AND THEN YOU
GO THIS MONEY CAME OUT OF ME STANDING WITH SOME WORDS AND A
MICROPHONE AND NOTHING ELSE AND IT WAS SUCH AN AMAZING FEELING
AND THEN I BECAME AN ACTOR. >> Stephen: YEAH, WHERE DID YOU —
>> WHAT HAPPENED? >> Stephen: AS A WRITER, WHAT’S YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH TECHNOLOGY? HOW DO YOU FEEL COMING AI
REVOLUTION? BECAUSE A LOT OF CREATORS ARE WORRIED ABOUT IT.
>> INTENSE IRRITATION. I CANNOT TELL YOU. I CANNOT BEGIN TO TELL
YOU BECAUSE AS I WRITE LONGHAND. >> Stephen: LIKE A LEGAL PAD? >>
ON A PAD. ON SCRIPT, ACTUALLY, BECAUSE I BELIEVE THERE IS A
CONNECTION BETWEEN THE BRAIN AND THE HANDS. [APPLAUSE] >>
Stephen: 100%. IF I HAVE TO MEMORIZE A PART I HAVE TO WRITE
IT DOWN. BECAUSE SO IT’S VERY IMPORTANT FOR ME TO DO THAT. AND
WHEN I’VE WRITTEN SOMETHING I WILL PUT IT INTO A WORD DOCUMENT
AND RECENTLY THE WORD DOCUMENT IS CONSTANTLY SAYING WOULD YOU
LIKE ME TO REWRITE THAT FOR YOU, AND SO I END UP JUST GETTING —
I DON’T NEED YOU TO [BLEEP] REWRITE WHAT I’VE JUST WRITTEN,
WILL YOU [BLEEP] OFF! JUST [BLEEP] OFF! AND I’M SO ANNOYED.
>> Stephen: HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT SHOWING YOUR COMPUTER YOUR
SCREENWRITING OSCAR? BECAUSE YOU DID WIN. >> I DON’T THINK THAT
IT WOULD CARE… >> Stephen: OH, NO. >> BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, I
REMEMBER ONCE WHEN I WAS FINISHING “SENSE AND
SENSIBILITY” ON THE COMPUTE AND SENSIBILITY” ON THE COMPU
COMPUTER. I HAD ONE OF THOSE BIG OLD SQUARE COMPUTERS WHICH WERE
A LITTLE BIT MORE FRIENDLY, AND I CAME BACK FROM THE LOOP,
LITERALLY, TO FIND THAT IT HAD CHANGED THE ENTIRE SCRIPT INTO
SORT OF HIEROGLYPHS, IT HAD COMPLETELY GONE. SO I PANICKED
AND IN MY DRESSING GOWN I GOT IN A TAXI AND THEY WENT — YOU KNOW
STEPHEN FRY? SO — I SAID YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. I HAVEN’T GOT A
COPY, YOU HAVE TO HELP ME. >> Stephen: THE SCRIPT FOR WHICH
YOU EVENTUALLY ONE MIGHT BE OSCAR. >> AND HE SAID LET ME
FIND — IT TOOK HIM EIGHT HOURS AND IT CAME OUT IN ONE LONG
SENTENCE AND I HAD TO REDO IT. IT WAS AS THOUGH THE COMPUTER
HAD TAKEN IT AND HIDDEN IT BEHIND THE WAINSCOTING, AND JUST
REALLY DONE IT ON PURPOSE. >> Stephen: VERY FEW LATE-NIGHT
SHOWS HAVE THE WORDS YOUNG AND WAINSCOTING IN THE SAME STORY.
>> I’M SO PROUD! >> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK. WE
WILL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE EMMA THOMPSON, EVERYBODY. STICK
AROUND.

Oscar-winner Emma Thompson dances onto The Late Show’s stage to chat with Stephen about her first stand-up comedy gig, and how to say “no thank you” when artificial intelligence assistants offer advice on one’s writing. Stick around for more with Emma Thompson and watch her new series, “Down Cemetery Road,” premiering Wednesday on AppleTV.

#Colbert #Comedy #EmmaThompson #DownCemetaryRoad #AppleTV #ArtificialIntelligence #StephenColbert #TheLateShow

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Stephen Colbert brings his signature satire and comedy to THE LATE SHOW with STEPHEN COLBERT, the #1 show in late night, where he talks with an eclectic mix of guests about what is new and relevant in the worlds of politics, entertainment, business, music, technology and more. Featuring bandleader Louis Cato and “THE LATE SHOW band,” the Peabody Award-winning and Emmy Award-nominated show is broadcast from the historic Ed Sullivan Theater. Stephen Colbert took over as host, executive producer and writer of THE LATE SHOW on Sept. 8, 2015.