Entertainment

Dave Portnoy slams Tiger Woods over DUI: “You’re gonna kill somebody”

March 30, 2026

View 24 Comments

24 Comments

Rich-Obligation1310 on March 30, 2026 5:29 pm

I don’t remember asking.
xXMoo_OomXx on March 30, 2026 5:34 pm

I would rather jump ass first in a dildo factory than listen to a fucking thing Port not says.
EmergencyLook2802 on March 30, 2026 5:35 pm

Never thought I would agree with this guy but hey a broken clock is right twice a day
better_every_day14 on March 30, 2026 5:44 pm

Broken clock I guess?
NashvilleDing on March 30, 2026 5:45 pm

I hate agreeing with him. Damn you tiger
Etzell on March 30, 2026 6:02 pm

Credibly accused rapist Dave Portnoy?
LivedLostLivalil on March 30, 2026 6:10 pm

A negative test for alcohol (police said he had no alcohol in his system, so I’m curious what test they are talking about) doesn’t automatically mean he was taking another substance like the police suggest. No one should ever agree to a urine test by police without a court order. It just takes one cop needing a case to prove themselves to charge you on a false positive or a positive based on regular foods. They are trying to do their job investigating you, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take steps to protect yourself from people who are trying to put forth any potential crime they can think of.
monkeyhoward on March 30, 2026 6:14 pm

Maybe it will be Pete Carroll and Dave will get his wish.

Wouldn’t that be ironic
2401PenitentTangentx on March 30, 2026 6:23 pm

Dave Portnoy 100% drives shit faced multiple times a week
jeno_aran on March 30, 2026 6:31 pm

Thanks for the bold stance Dave Portnoy
kennyloftor on March 30, 2026 6:35 pm

here come the racist losers that glaze portnoy
ComicsEtAl on March 30, 2026 6:36 pm

Nobody loves Captain Dave enough to tell him to sit this one out.
ninjaface on March 30, 2026 6:43 pm

DOWNVOTE THIS DIPSHIT.

Pizza bro says stuff while ruining sports with his betting BS.

FUUUUUCK dave porthole.
ohjeezs on March 30, 2026 6:47 pm

Thanks Captain Obvious
frazorblade on March 30, 2026 6:47 pm

Anyone got Ja Rule’s take on this?
aipac125 on March 30, 2026 7:04 pm

Also Dave- lets bomb Greta Thunburg
space_cheese1 on March 30, 2026 7:11 pm

The pizza man speaks
bigstrizzydad on March 30, 2026 7:16 pm

I’d rather ride with Tiger than listen to a racist scumbag like Portnoy.
robbadobba on March 30, 2026 7:17 pm

In other news, Portnoy gives random pizza joint a 6.4.
BreastTickles on March 30, 2026 7:43 pm

He will kill somebody. But he’s rich, famous, and if he kills with a car he won’t suffer any consequences. I’m sure he’s already been told to decline any sobriety test no matter what.
twstdbydsn on March 30, 2026 7:47 pm

Can Portnoy even see over the steering wheel without a booster seat?
Movinginplace25 on March 30, 2026 7:49 pm

Apparently you don’t care about yourself or the people that love you but maybe think about the other souls on the road. Nice role model.
jsakic99 on March 30, 2026 8:01 pm

Dave Portnoy: The voice of reason, lol
Sinisterminister77 on March 30, 2026 8:03 pm

Avid Trump supporter during Iran worried about Tiger Woods killing someone