NEED TO KNOW
Abby and Matt Howard discussed feeling “gender disappointment” after learning they are expecting their third boy
The couple previously experienced pregnancy loss at 17 weeks with their daughter Emerson Nicole
Matt shared he initially felt sad but is now excited to welcome another boy into their family
Abby and Matt Howard are opening up about feeling “gender disappointment” after learning the sex of their fourth baby.
During a Wednesday, April 22 episode of the Unplanned Podcast, the influencers spoke about learning the sex of their baby-to-be. At one point, Abby admitted that she felt a little bit of disappointment about the sex after discovering they were expecting another son.
“I would say for me, I did feel gender disappointment,” said Abby. “For about 30 seconds. Maybe less.”
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“I’ve always said, ‘I feel like we’re gonna have boys.’ And then sure enough, we had one boy, we had our second boy, and then losing our daughter definitely opened up a desire for something,” continued the pregnant influencer. She went on to say she’d “love” to welcome a baby girl but never felt an “obvious preference.”
In a Sept. 27 Instagram post, the couple announced that Abby experienced pregnancy loss at 17 weeks with a baby girl. They shared that they were at a “routine pregnancy appointment” when the doctor was unable to find a heartbeat. They later found out their baby, whom they named Emerson Nicole, had a “genetic condition that took her life.”
When Matt asked if Abby felt any guilt about being disappointed, she said she didn’t.
“I always pictured having all boys, and then we lost [our daughter] and that kind of opened a preference in my heart that I’ve never had before,” explained Abby. “Getting pregnant again, I was nervously hoping, ‘I hope we have a daughter.'”
Abby then got emotional and began crying. She said, “I didn’t have a girl-sized hole in my heart, I had an Emerson-sized hole in my heart. Having another baby girl wasn’t going to fix that. I think this was sweet grace, in a way. It’s very obvious now that this baby is not going to fill that gap.”
Abby, who is already mom to sons Griffin, 3, and August, 2, then asked her husband if he felt any disappointment about expecting another boy.
“Oh gosh. I guess, to be completely honest, yeah,” admitted Matt. “We lost our daughter. I really did want a daughter.”
Matt explained that he was sad about the news at first because he wanted Abby to experience having a little girl.
“More than anything, I want that for you. I want you to have a mini version of you,” he said to Abby. “I see the sweet bond that you and your mom have.”
However, Matt said that he’s now really excited to welcome another boy in the next few months.
“I’m so excited to have three boys. I am one of three boys,” said Matt. “We talked about how it is to have your boys.”
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