Millie Bobby Brown on people who criticize her husband for not helping her with her bags: ‘I’m three miles ahead, I have been planning this all night’
Posted by mcfw31
Millie Bobby Brown on people who criticize her husband for not helping her with her bags: ‘I’m three miles ahead, I have been planning this all night’
Posted by mcfw31
29 Comments
Benevolent sexism is what she’s referring to. And she’s right.
She’s right!
Leave it to the internet to turn something innocent into something negative and sinister.
Some people are raised to help when they see someone struggling(especially someone they love). Others are raised to assume someone else will handle it. That photo made it pretty obvious which category he falls into.. she’s trying too hard to defend this. lol
This is amazing, i really like her stance on this rather than jumping in on the “man bad” discourse. “carry your own bags, wtf, my husbands awesome”
She’s not wrong. And I think a lot of people see men or experience men who are actively not helping women in their lives and so when they see a celeb “not helping,” they make that the story, regardless of whether or not it’s true. I’m sure it’s not fun for her to defend herself or her husband in this scenario. I think we just have a long way to go before we’re no longer having this kind of conversation at all.
Like, I get it. But also, holding a bunch of shit AND a baby is dangerous. Like, hell yeah sisters, hills a bunch of bags OR hold your child safely, get him out your assistants to do the other.
ridiculous. being up all night and planning ahead is fun for you now, at 22. but in ten years when you’ve been up all night, doing all the planning and 3 miles ahead carrying everything, you’re going to be questioning why he’s 3 miles back. it’s not about you being a “girlboss” it’s about him being lackadaisical while you handle everything.
this is the same girl who said that he has to be reminded to pack his stuff for trips, and that he eventually conveniently “forgets” so that he can stop off when they get off the plane to buy his stuff while he’s there. some will say they’ve got the money, but i don’t think the money is the issue. i think the fact that she gets everything ready for herself and the baby and STILL has to peck at him to get prepared is the problem. she’s a 22 year old single married mother of two. she’s like, his mom. i want to say i hate to be judgy but that would be a lie- i am absolutely being judgy and i think he’s super freaking childish, and that this isn’t going to end favorably for her.
like, you’ve been in all 5 seasons of stranger things, one of the biggest netflix shows ever. you were the breadwinner then, as a child and you’ve talked about how that situation impacted you, as a child taking care of her parents financially. now you’re the breadwinner in your marriage, and you also do the domestic work of planning everything ? and you have to carry your own bags ?
to me it’s not about whether or not it’s she’s capable of doing it all- i definitely feel like i’m a feminist but im sorry, i don’t see how being your husband’s MOTHER at 22 is “girlboss”-ing. it just feels sad.
edit- i turn 23 in two weeks. i get that we all mature at different rates and maybe she is genuinely ready for motherhood but…i just cannot imagine this being my life right now. maybe that’s why it’s just so mind boggling to me, that she’s my age and she’s already in the rat race of single mothers that are technically married but they have childish ass partners.
No one thinks women are incapable…we just know men, and when you have said your husband doesn’t even help pack for family vacations, we know what that tends to signify. It’s valid to be suspicious of this behaviour
Of Course You can do it on your own! but a marriage is a partnership. Idk what instance she’s talking about but this video she stated “ when I’m holding all my suitcases, and bags and my kid” … that’s crazy to me. If her husband was not there, that’s fair.It’s not about not being able to do it, it’s about your partner helping you with your load.
Of course, I don’t know their relationship, but there’s a photo where she’s carrying the baby and two backpacks while her husband is carrying nothing. Yeah, she’s physically capable of carrying all of that by herself, doesn’t mean she has to, he should still help lighten her load. Alternatively, maybe she’s the one who needs to be more comfortable accepting help from others. Either way, I don’t think that particular photo looks normal.
Not sure if I can articulate my thoughts in a way that makes sense but… I think a lot of people seeing it are trying to defend the fact that in this day and age women are not solely responsible for children and it should be shared between parents when possible. They overreact when they see photos of this couple, assuming he’s a lazy man who doesn’t help. The reality is, of course, that we have no idea how they coparent or share responsibilities. The paparazzi photos we see are just a tiny portion of their lives together.
Feels like there has been a bit of overcorrecting in trying to make sure women don’t have to do everything and that men help with children. That created the issues Millie is talking about. Women can do as much or as little as men and it will be different in every partnership.
It was so dumb how people were talking so much shit when she was carrying the stuff. Even on here it was the usual insult men, men are useless and so on. People love to pick and criticize everything.
My boyfriend is polite and sweet and helpful, but he still needed to be taught what emotional labour was. Seems like if she was up all night planning, he should be putting more effort into helping out the following day. She can’t even rely on her husband to pack his own bag appropriately. I really like her. I hope she’s getting what she needs out of the relationship. If she doesn’t want the public to comment on her relationship, she should stop talking about it.
>“My husband… he doesn’t pack any clothes just ever,” she said, explaining how he just takes his phone and laptop, leaving all other essentials behind.
She claimed he would steal her mobile charger during the trip. But inevitably, at some point during the trip, he would take a look at their luggage and realize he had nothing to wear.
“Mil, I don’t have any clothes,” the actress said, imitating her husband.
“And I go, ‘no sh*t, Sherlock. You didn’t pack anything.’ And he goes, ‘Yeah… I dunno. Maybe I just have to go shopping here. And that is where he gets you,” she continued.
And then her husband goes shopping for clothes that he wouldn’t need if he packed properly while she cares for the baby? It just doesn’t seem healthy to me.
My husband is disabled and I have to constantly tell him that anyone who would judge him for seeing me, the wife, carrying the heavy things doesn’t matter because they’re judgmental assholes. I still understand his feelings because I also know there are probably people judging me for “putting up with it”, but we can’t let them control us or let our pride cause us needless pain.
Idk, only kind of the same thing as what they’re discussing here, but kind of because I would still carry plenty of heavy stuff even if he wasn’t disabled. Im strong and capable all on my own.
I get it, but also if someone is carrying a lot of stuff regardless of gender or age or relation, the kind thing to do is help.
Obviously she’s physically capable of holding her bags and baby, i see women do it all the time. It was the juxtaposition of him being right behind her with two empty hands that made people roll their eyes lol
Makes me think of when my badass former boss had a dude get all up in her face during COVID and called her a cunt for enforcing the mask mandate. As a dude, I saw red and was ready to fucking pounce on this guy and she saw my face and said “i can handle this” and she put that fucker in his place.
I apologized for white knighting.
It’s been really popular lately to boast about this “I don’t need to use my brain when my man is around!” attitude and it seems like she’s being criticized by people who really buy into that being an amazing thing. There’s a difference between a balanced relationship where you can trust your partner and help each other equally (and sometimes, do everything for a bit while the other person rests) and being treated like a helpless “princess”. Obviously she may be defending him when he doesn’t deserve it but I totally understand why she thinks people criticizing this is annoying. Some of us don’t actually like going to the airport or whatever barely cognizant of what’s going on lol
Eta: I just found the photos I believe are in question and it literally looks like she’s wearing a backpack, carrying the car seat, and holding another backpack, and he’s wearing a backpack and carrying the stroller base. Like it’s barely uneven and it looks like they’re just scrambling out of a car after traveling. I can’t find a great link that’s not a tiktok or something but I googled millie bobby brown carrying stuff lol
ok edit again bc I have a moment and it seems like people are really imagining something that didn’t happen. there is also another pic where they’re standing right next to the car and he’s shaking someone’s hand and not holding anything yet other than his backpack. also idk where this was but I’m assuming they’re not walking very far because they didn’t put the stroller together?
https://preview.redd.it/z6ueo6xwgp6h1.png?width=665&format=png&auto=webp&s=62db946bb4f41fba7df6879dcda9af8792bee504
If Millie feels better being in control of the moment (especially after leaving a very controlling home life), let her. Her husband respecting the way she wants to do stuff isn’t bad
Believe women! Unless that woman is saying that her husband did nothing wrong and the internet is just being weird and projecting their own issues onto a relationship after seeing a picture because she’s clearly lying to herself and there’s definitely trouble in the relationship because of his weaponized incompetence or he’s ignoring her needs or whatever issue you’ve experienced in life and can spot happening a mile away because you know better than to believe her
I don’t know her or course but she does seem like a go-getter/energetic type person that likes to be in control so I can completely believe that she’s not exactly waiting on her husband to do stuff for her. I think by assuming that she’s struggling and afraid to ask her husband for help is infantalizing her.
I’m not a celebrity or in the public eye and I don’t believe you should give in to the whims of your fans or critics. But surely the PR team have explained to them the optics don’t look good.
But I find it very interesting that after they received criticism that it looks like her husband doesn’t help or do his fair share when out and about, which portrays him in a bad light.
Instead of just making sure that he is more helpful when out and being papped that Millie has chosen to double down on “girl power” and “not needing a man”.
I’d just be a bit embarrassed if it was me getting criticism over not helping my partner, even if it’s not true, I wouldn’t want to be repeatedly photographed not helping.
https://preview.redd.it/mryv8owo8p6h1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8a0ac93030327fe4626e747c94d21ba949109332
Idk man I still think he should’ve been carrying things
It’s lowkey ridiculous she even felt she had to reply to this
I also think we have to remember women are not a monolith! Some women love having their bags carried for them and some do not. My best friend likes having her purse / bag carried by her man ONLY when she’s drunk 🤣
I’ve never cared for a man holding my bag?? However if I have a thousand things, yes please help. But everyone IS different and commenting on something as silly like that IS weird!
Man if people can stop making assumptions that would be great
A good reminder that some people can be perfectly happy with the dynamic of their relationship even if others have different preferences.
I… did not realize that anybody was serious when they said that.