BLAKE LIVELY & TAYLOR SWIFT’S SUPER BOWL! Mom Guilt & How to Stop Feeling Guilty | Shallon Lester

💋GET 1-ON-1 HELP FROM ME 💋 https://www.passes.com/shallonxo
💎XOSTYLEBOX, first month free! 💎https://www.xostylebox.com/
👑THE SHALLONTOURAGE: FRIENDS, EXCLUSIVE VIDS, EVIL WEEK, CHATS WITH ME! 👑 https://hdly.me/shallon
✨SHOP MY COIN NECKLACE ✨
https://www.instagram.com/juliesgoldcoins?igsh=NjA3eTlyZHd3MjN5

#taylorswift #blakelively #superbowl @TaylorSwift

💜 Listen To My Podcast:
Apple: https://apple.co/2YxmmeA
Spotify: https://spoti.fi/335AdMt

🔥SHOP SLXO CLOTHING 🔥https://bit.ly/3INA1GT
💋 GET A CUSTOM VIDEO (US) 💋 https://www.cameo.com/shallonxo
💋 GET A CUSTOM VIDEO (UK, AUS, CANADA) 💋https://bit.ly/3rVQenl

💜 Subscribe: http://bit.ly/2YzOtJV
💜 Follow On Insta: http://bit.ly/2YmMQnR
💜 Follow on TikTok: https://bit.ly/3EMtGJ9

💜 Watch More Shallon Lester💜
Latest Uploads: http://bit.ly/31jN8cg
⭐Kardashian Psychology: http://bit.ly/31nX2cR
⭐Confidence & Body Image: http://bit.ly/2SYo87c
⭐The Truth About Taylor Swift: http://bit.ly/2T7zkyx
⭐Gigi & Bella Hadid: http://bit.ly/2Ti93NX
⭐College Dating & More: http://bit.ly/2ZqfAIP
⭐Players & F**kboys: http://bit.ly/2SY8cSF
⭐The Truth About Shawn Mendes: http://bit.ly/2ZC04ti

💜About Shallon Lester💜
CELEB GOSSIP AND LOVE LESSONS!

Got a love, dating or friendship question? You’ve come to the right place! I’m Shallon Lester, a two-time published author, NYC magazine editor and star of Howcast’s viral kissing videos. I spill the tea on celebs like Kylie Jenner, the Kardashians, Beyonce, Shawn Mendes, Justin Bieber, Hailey Baldwin, Rihanna and more, breaking down their relationships, scandals and psychology to see what lessons WE can learn, and give you no-nonsense advice and real-world tips on everything from dating apps and players, to family and friends!

Welcome back shig Gators today we’re going to talk about someone we don’t really get to talk about cuz she’s never really out and about Blake Lively if you guys are a Gossip Girl Stan as I am you guys know my history with Gossip Girl I used to write for

Them a little bit like whatever it’s that’s what we’re here to talk about it’s really not that interesting but Blake Lively is so if you love her the way I do I think you’re going to like this video because yeah like I said she’s never out and about and she was at

The Super Bowl and I know the Super Bowl was like in Celebrity terms like 500 years ago or something but Blake recently posted some pictures from the event and on Instagram she said something that I feel like no one else is talking about but we’re going to talk about

It she said this was the first time she had left her kids which leads me to ask just one question what the [ __ ] are you serious I guess that’s two questions but I’m sorry what the [ __ ] and are you serious are questions that I feel like need to be

Asked because if you think oh this is a mom shaming video no it’s actually the opposite it’s I what is I am encouraging moms to do things I would even encourage them to be doing things that other people would be considering shameful I love it Blake

We’re going to talk okay we love you girl we’re going to talk also about those pants you were wearing didn’t love those but before we get started I want to give you a dispatch it’s been a while from the naine news network so my mom will send

Like positive things to me because she knows I will not listen to the news because it’s so Doom and Gloom you know you get the amount of news that you need like I know what’s going on in the world it’s just literally such a hellscape so she will send me like good positive

Things I’m like okay I’ll pass it on to my girls and everything and she was telling me about the misery index do you know what this is so the misery index factors in unemployment and cost of living and so the higher the index the worse things are that means there’s a

High Cost of Living and there’s high unemployment so the lower the misery index the better the economy is doing overall and the misery index is at its lowest since the pandemic so I think that’s really good because I don’t know I see these things on Instagram recession is coming start growing

Turn-ups like people are just it’s terroristic so this kind of helped me calm it down a little bit so I I just wanted to pass that on to you guys let’s talk Blake Lively I need to read to you her Instagram caption and like I said we

Don’t really hear a lot from Blake Lively at all because she lives I think in like Upstate New York with Ryan Reynolds her smoke show of a husband and hopefully well I assume all they do is like the sex because they’ve got a lot of kids they’ve got four

Kids not a lot has known about the kids are really private but they’ve got four daughters James who’s nine inz is seven Betty who’s four these names and they had a another daughter their fourth daughter about basically a year ago so February 2023 so 9 to one those are the the age

Ranges okay so Blake posted some photos on Instagram from her Super Bowl look and her Super Bowl trip and she said last week I left my kids for the first time ever and I wore pants that were shoes she wore some uh balain pants shoes things I took pictures of upside

Down and had no clue I treated a friendship bracelet Like A Flat Stanley from my husband like I didn’t realize it wasn’t ‘ 07 I have no idea what that sence mean I treated a friendship bracelet Like A Flat Stanley for my husband Like A Flat Stanley for my husband like I didn’t

Realize it wasn’t 2007 I don’t get any of that I’ve never felt more like a boomer I borrowed more jewelry than the skeleton and the Pirates of the Caribbean ride I went clubbing now I know what my episode of The Twilight Zone would look like like that’s really

Cute she’s like I’m I’m like breaking out and so she famously went to the Super Bowl with Taylor Swift and I was kind of hoping she would post like you know some Insider things I don’t love this outfit it’s like an Adidas balain pants shoot it’s

Not it’s not my favorite it’s not my favorite but I’m just glad she’s out and about oh by the way speaking of wearing things do you guys like this necklace look at this my friend Julie makes these out of like vintage coins and then she puts them on these

Chains I am obsessed with that I just got it so I know I look maybe a little bit like a wrapper I need to style it better I’m thinking like a white v-neck shirt with layered gold necklaces do you know what I mean very like casual rich

[ __ ] cuz I just always want to look like a rich rich [ __ ] and very rarely a casual one usually a fancy high maintenance absolutely dragon-like rich [ __ ] but back to Blake oh I’ll put the link down below for these uh you can buy them on Instagram they’re under a

Hundred bucks these things are like you can get them in Florence and they’re like $1,300 I’m not even kidding you it’s crazy last week I left my kids for the first time ever is she serious she can’t be Ser that can’t be serious she sounded

Serious cuz she led with it and she said ever and I don’t believe Blake Lively lies I don’t believe I don’t believe she does I’ve met her before many times and she is so lovely the whole cast of Gossip Girl honestly is they’re all great and I have like oh Chase

Crawford is breathtaking and I don’t describe many men as breathtaking he is he literally I was like like I gasped when I saw him in real life we oh we had a fun time at a Super Bowl once we did Irish car bombs together it’s a drink

Don’t don’t cancel me cuz it’s like not an appropriate name I didn’t [ __ ] name the drink okay I don’t know what else to call him anyway I don’t believe Blake lies she’s a lovely person I I’m sorry my mind is just blown that she has that she’s had kids for

Nine years 10 if you count pregnancy which I do cuz yikes and she’s never left them why not listen you guys know I don’t have kids I don’t want kids I don’t like kids motherhood seems unfathomably difficult unfathomably difficult I watch my friends with kids and I’m like holy

[ __ ] I just I can’t believe this many children have survived to adulthood children are nightmarish do you know that children don’t have empathy that it’s extremely rare for a child under the age of five to have any empathy so they’re just these little tyrants these little terrorists taking taking taking

Let’s not forget they’ve blown your vag out and chewed your nipples off so there’s that do you know one of my friends who has kids one of her feet is a different size she has two different size feet from pregnancy she has to buy two pairs of shoes every time she buys

Shoes and she’s like it’s worth it it’s not Sarah I’m telling you right now it’s not you know that I know it’s not that’s good if she thinks it is so there there these little terrorists who have no empathy and all they do is take

I don’t know how moms do this I don’t know how and I read things like this from Blake where she’s like I’ve never left them and I’m like like are you kidding me let me be clear here Mom guilt which is the way moms feel I’m not

Doing good enough I should be doing better I can’t leave my kids as someone very much on the outside looking in the concept of mom guilt to women without kids is [ __ ] crazy like it’s crazy you guys would guilt yourself for like what it’s not like

You’re putting your kids in a cage and I mean to be honest I could maybe get it sometime I could get it but you’re not doing that you’re like what what hold on let let me check some notes Here let me check some notes Here what is it you feel guilty about going

To Barnes & Noble and getting a coffee and reading a magazine for 45 minutes you feel guilty for doing that you should not let me tell you that on behalf of all the delightfully childfree women out there we believe you guys should be feeling zero guilt ever ever ever you’re

Just Warriors I don’t know I I won’t lie to you I have absolutely no idea why you guys do it I really don’t it makes no sense to me it’s worth it I get love you don’t know what love is I do know what love is thank you I don’t know what

Maybe that particular brand of Love is but I know what love is I’ve never in my life and God I don’t think I know what love is and that’s honestly an extremely insulting thing to say to somebody that because they’re not walking your path they don’t know they can’t even relate

To the feeling like they just they don’t they don’t really exist as a person okay this is just a side a side note if you’re going to come for us childree women in the comments maybe you guys don’t know what happiness is because you don’t seem happy or you seem like you’re

Constantly gaslighting yourself into happiness I know what happiness is I’m happy all the time I mean unless I’m heartbroken or I’m bored but I’m the master of my fortune I can do whatever and in fact I was going to go to Bar & Noble after this and get a coffee and

Read a magazine and it’s like the highlight of my day and not a goddamn person is going to make me feel guilty about it so listen borrow a little bit of that attitude from me cuz I am bit of a narcissist bit of a sociopath and I am

One of the happiest people that I know because of that because I don’t feel guilt I never have I never have I feel empathy less than most people but I don’t feel guilt and I think because of that and if you’re in the chalant trage

We talk about this a lot like I will give you step by-step ways to reduce guilt and I’ll tell you what they are here I am happy because I don’t feel guilt and that means my life gets to belong to me it gets to belong to me and

It also means I maybe shouldn’t be a mom because that guilt thing really seems to be a huge issue for y’all and again like girl it doesn’t need to be you are doing great you’re doing great you are your kids are alive aren’t they are they slowly dying of scurvy okay well mine

Might be if I had them i”d be like I no I won’t roll an orange in your direction Braxton I’m not going to do that I can’t vouch for what kind of parent I would be but I can say that you’re doing just fine you know if your kids are like

Reasonably kind even though we said they don’t have empathy but if they’re like not complete shits if they understand table manners at an appropriate age um if they don’t hurt animals if they care about recycling they’re fine you’re doing great go read your magazine go to the

[ __ ] Super Bowl it breaks my heart that Blake has never left her kids and listen you’re probably saying she doesn’t have to leave her kids she probably gets to bring them everywhere true true I look at it kind of from the opposite direction it’s like she’s got

So much help at her fingertips if she wants it I don’t know if she has nannies I would assume so I would I would I would hope so why not have 10 why not then then do the fun part of parenting don’t do that I want to watch FL

Don’t put up with that part just be there for the snuggles and the dance recitals and the dressing them up and will that lead to a lot of therapy down the line I don’t [ __ ] know but you’ll keep your wits about you yeah you owe things to your kids you owe things to

You I was put on this Earth to be a mom okay well maybe part of being a good mom is being good to yourself you should not have Mom guilt and I was talking to my own mom about this I’m like is this a thing because my

Mom left me all the time she was a flight attendant when I was young and I turned out moving on I turned out how he turned out and I’m like did you did you always feel guilty she’s like every minute of every day I’m like why well first of all like

Let’s get into a doctor for it I was like then why didn’t you pick a different job cuz it kind of did [ __ ] me up she’s like I just loved it and I knew I had to be the best version of myself if I was

Going to be a great mom and she was an amazing mom when she was there she was an amazing mom when she was there and I respect that now especially as an adult I respect it immensely because at the time I thought you know

My I don’t I have a mom who’s not around all the time and you know when you’re a kid time is a flat circle cuz my mom has been over and over this with me she’s like I was not gone as much as you think

I was and I’m like I was five you know like I don’t know what time is I was like a dog I was like a large dog right dogs don’t understand anything I didn’t understand how elevators worked I was like it’s a whole new world but now that I’m

Older I realized she gave me an amazing example of identity and boundaries and and being a woman and what that means and why it’s like listen you have to make yourself happy because if you ain’t happy ain’t nobody happy if Mom ain’t happy forget about it for the rest

Of the family and so in that I really value that that’s how she lived her life cuz she lived her truth and therefore that makes me able to live mine I’m not going to lie part of that is perhaps a little spite based that I’m like no I’m

Not going to live where you you live if I don’t want to because you made yourself happy as an adult and I’m going to make myself happy and that might not look the way the rest of my family thinks it should oh well that is the downside you know it’s

Like well I don’t remember getting a vote in these situations when I was a kid okay I don’t remember everyone cow Towing to me I’m sure they did so it’s like all right I’m going to grow up and not cow toow to anyone else too thank

You for setting that example for me so Mom if you’re like I can’t leave my kids I can’t leave my kids first of all you could be actually doing them a disservice you could be teaching them that you as a woman have no identity outside of them if you’re especially

Raising little boys is that really what you want them to think about women hey women are just there for them they are the Masters of the Universe they’re the main character in the story of all of creation and women are there just like Sims waiting to blow waiting

To cook waiting to pick things Up is that what you want to raise and loose into the world I got news for you I’ll probably be dating your sons or his friends when I’m like a thousand years old I don’t want to date that I don’t want to date that at all okay I’ll wait

Another 20 years see what he turns out like how about that and here’s another reason that you should go and like have your own identity and live somewhat reasonably your own life it’s something called rupture and repair almost any psychologist will tell you about this it’s you rupture something you know oh

No this is a scary thing mommy’s getting in the car and she’s going away but then she comes back that creates resiliency because it shows them life doesn’t end and things actually turn out fine and you can trust that Mommy’s going to come home it’s okay

Also can I just say this is my own personal like Hill to die on I think it is so detrimental when moms refer TOS in the third person to their kids mommy said no mommy said to put that down there was none of that [ __ ]

Third person stuff in my house it was I said put it down I said it there’s no cutesy folksy term between you the child the perpetrator and me the creature who’s getting mad at you they’re one in the same we’re going to remove that little nickname middleman I’m mad at

You okay I need to go out I am on the phone mommy’s on the phone mommy’s on the phone cuz in life people are not going to approach your child in a third party waitress wants your order boss wants you to finish that project it’s what’s your

Order finish the project you again you are doing them I believe this is just again my hill to die on I believe you’re doing them a disservice because you’re again making them feel like they’re this main character in this play and everyone else in the world is simply a character around

Them rough landing real rough Landing you know I don’t think you want to see what kind of fruit that bears let’s get back to this mom guil thing I do have to I do have to wonder I do have to wonder what um what’s up with Ryan

Reynolds I have heard I have heard in the gossip around town that he the reason him and Scarlett Johansson remember them and remember him and ala Moret the reason him and Scarlet never worked out is he wanted her basically barefoot and pregnant she’s like no I’m like the biggest actress in the world

I’m going to kind of keep following this and pull on this thread and Blake was like yeah I want to stay home and be domestic and listen Different Strokes for different folks you know no shade to the women who want to stay home but I would gouge my [ __ ] eyes

Out I don’t know that’s just I God bless the women who are out there doing that it’s so not my vibe and I’m a pretty domestic person I mean I live in rural Montana you know I’m but then it’s like I got to go get my wiggles out and go do

Things and I wonder gosh well what’s has Ryan can he say he’s never left the kids maybe maybe and maybe they just travel as this family unit everywhere together and if someone’s on a movie set they’re all together and that’s cool that’s really cool but if it isn’t if it isn’t

Because listen that’s not most families situation that might be theirs because they’re wealthy enough to afford to do that and they can pick their projects that are in alternating times most people it’s like well I’m I’m going to work Monday Tuesday you’re going to work Wednesday Thursday Friday that’s not how

Households work it’s everyone’s working every day you know so we don’t have that luxury I have just never heard of the term dad guilt I’ve just never heard that term have you guys heard it yeah no me neither me neither you know what I have heard the men who say that they’re

Babysitting their own children right I can’t imagine how hard it is to be a parent nor can I imagine how hard it is to be a parent when you have a [ __ ] ass partner my mom kind of did it right she did it alone because in her

Mind it was better to just know that you don’t have help that’s pulling up for you rather than constantly thinking you do and be being constantly disappointed you know that’s a terrible feeling that’s a terrible feeling you want to know where the edge of the box is and

You your child wants to know that too like that’s important for your child to know not like maybe daddy will pick you up from school maybe not I don’t know versus like no we’re going to have to like hire this out like you can solve these things that come up it’s I just

Feel so bad for women who are in that situation and I look at so many of my friends and that’s exactly what what’s happening that’s exactly their situation and it’s like it’s easy for me to say this of course course from the outside but it does seem like it’d be easier on their

Own but maybe not I don’t know motherhood is a son of a [ __ ] man it’s it is tough it is tough without a lot of money and even then still seems pretty tough and that’s why like this idea of mom guilt I’m like what and my mom was

Explaining it to me and I’m like why would cuz she’s like it wasn’t just about me flying and being gone like you just never know if you’re doing it right you just you just kind of don’t know you’re you think you are and like feels right but then you’re like oh my God

What if I’m giving them this complex and what if this one thing I said they’re going to remember 10 years from now in therapy I did how do you like ever feel confident in yourself as a mom and therefore those doubts creep in and then of course

You’re going to feel guilty when you go to Barnes & Noble and have your magazine latte time because it’s like oh when I’m home I’m [ __ ] them up and I’m not even home I’m not even home I’m out here being a dick and just like living for

Myself let us go back to that let’s go back to that as I said bit of a sociopath bit of a narcissist whole lot of happy guilt is not a useful emotion it’s not it’s not useful for you that is that’s the caveat it is incredibly useful for everyone around

You if you feel guilt incredibly useful because when you feel guilty you get real small if we had to draw the posture of guilt it’s curled in on I’m sorry you are very very easy to manipulate very easy to manipulate and it’s one of those things

That you can press on pretty easily and get a great result like if you’re a toxic predator and you know that someone is prone to feeling guilty you have to do the least for them to jump the highest oh you can’t take me to the airport at 4:30 in the

Morning no that’s fine I just felt like Ubers are really dangerous cuz like literally who are these people but I’m sure I’ll be okay I’m okay suddenly they’re up of 3:30 in the morning ready to drive you guilt works for everyone but us how do you benefit from

Guilt how do you benefit from guilt I’m a pretty analytical person yeah I’m an emotional person but I’m pretty analytical also and it’s like that’s kind of where I reached with guilt it’s like this is not serving me and the more I feel this the worse my life gets and I

Literally decided never to feel it again and I I think I was like five when I made this decision I was like this is stupid I’m not doing this I wasn’t prone to feeling it anyway and I could always very easily see when people were trying

To give me a guilt trip and I’d be like so it’s going to be like that and that boy oh boy they picked the wrong fight because then I would then I would become a bully I would become a bully because I really did not appreciate being manipulated and I’m again I’m talking

About like when I was a child I could feel it and I could see it and it’s like appealing to emotions I don’t have and now I can see what you’re actually after you’re actually after compliance you’re just trying to get me to do what you want and listen that’s

How people operate towards kids in general like you you have to get them compliant to make them a productive member of society in a lot of ways but the older I got the more clearly I could see when people were trying to run this

Game on me and the faster I could see it and now I can see it a [ __ ] mile away and I’m just like you dumb [ __ ] this is such such a mistake this is such a mistake no I had a friend the other day who does not believe I belong in

Montana she thinks she’s the little queen bee of this town okay first of all she’s not even the queen bee of this town um she’s not the queen bee of anything you know let alone like this little town that I’m sorry nobody cares about I love it here

But it’s not New York it’s not Chicago it’s not Miami it’s not London like give me a [ __ ] break and she’s not even that she’s delusional and she was like you need to start volunteering Shon you need to start giving back to your community and I was like there it is

Okay not for a second did I take that bait not for a second I said I don’t need to earn my way into this town okay I don’t need to prove myself and give of myself to prove that I belong here I just get to be here and I get to be

Wherever the [ __ ] I want okay she was like if I volunteer it’s cuz I want to not because I’m like paying Penance to the bowan gods oh please love me please accept me I do volunteer because I like it but not because like well like I feel I feel bad for being here

And I need to like supplicate myself you picked the wrong person w wow wow don’t run that [ __ ] game on me and if you start to look for it guilt is a tool that is being used on you all over the place oh you can’t stay late well it’s just it’s Braxton’s

Recital tonight and you know I really wanted to go but I guess you just won’t stay late no Beth I won’t sorry I have a life of my own and you should have put in for that time off so he’ll have another recital or he won’t you know why

Cuz he’s bad at the clarinet so get over it but the reason the guilt works I well it’s twofold we fundamentally agree that we’re not worthy and when someone is like you’re not worthy we’re like oh my God right I know I know I’m not thank you

For validating that we like it’s like this sick massage or like yeah [ __ ] yeah guilt daddy we like it it’s validating because what are we we are a risk machine we are a risk machine we want to feel like we can predict an outcome we

Want to feel like we got a good bead on things and if we feel fundamentally Unworthy of self-care of time of identity of following our thoughts and our dreams and living an authentic life if we fundamentally feel no we actually don’t have a right to that someone comes

Along and is like hey you don’t have a right to that and we’re like I know we feel kind of good about that because we have accurately predicted something and the risk machine is like hm nice the heart machine is like okay you know our soul machine is

Like God this again but the risk machine chuffed perfectly chuffed so that’s one way guilt works and the way we become desensitized those guilt trips is to live a life where our motto is no one belongs here more than you no one belongs in Barnes & Noble sipping

Not latte more than you no one belongs in that boardroom that secret Club in Mayfair London in this wedding chapel like no one belongs here more than you you belong and I’m telling you people like me with my personality disorders oh we know we belong we’re

VIP oh you don’t think I am that’s weird it just rolls right off us that’s why when my friends like you need to volunteer AKA to earn your place here I was like no I don’t no I belong here no one belongs here more than me no one

Belongs anywhere more than me you can you can belong here too we can all belong here I don’t care it’s not only me but I definitely belong here thank you it’s a nicer plan so the more you can build your self-esteem you don’t have to a personality disorder if you

Don’t want to it’s a lot of fun though if you can develop your self-esteem you will learn to combat that guilt how do you develop self-esteem you do esteemable things hold on though hold on you might be saying okay raising kids is esteemable there is a difference there’s an overlap

But there is also a difference between esteemable things and martyrdom yes raising kids is an esteemable Endeavor volunteering and an este estable Endeavor but when it comes at the cost of your own self it becomes martyrdom and that is that is the opposite of self-esteem that’s the opposite of self-esteem that’s a victim

Narrative and victims become bullies and and they get their own personality disorder which is a nightmare they’re just awful to be around so you got to learn when to rain it in I’m going to I’m going to do these esteemable things but not to my own detriment I’m not

Going to pour from an empty cup I’m not going to go into like an energetic bankruptcy I’m not going to be overdrawn in terms of yeah energy or literally in terms of money I’m not going to do that I’m going to give what’s appropriate and

Then I’m going to move on to the next esteemable thing and the people who want to keep take take Taking from me those aren’t my friends at all those aren’t my friends so that’s how you build that worthiness and that’s how you learn to combat the guilt

Trips the other way you learn to combat the guilt trips say this with me have you tried going and [ __ ] yourself try so let’s say it huh have you tried shutting the [ __ ] up you try to shut the [ __ ] up we tried that you make friends with the worst

Case scenario okay you don’t drive your friend to the airport and what happens does the world end do they get kidnapped and chopped up by an Uber driver I don’t know maybe probably not and if they do you can deal with that later you know with a Catholic priest or whatever your

God is probably not the probably be fine odds are what if you’re just like oh I can’t do that ooh thanks for trying to make me feel guilty but I actually don’t want to do that we talked about this very thing in the chalant trage I did a whole video

On being a people pleaser and how to break out of it and it’s basically this it’s like make friends with the monster under the bed walk towards the apocalypse what happens if you’re like no I’m leaving the kids for two days you’ll be fine then [ __ ] feed them

Cheerios for dinner Dylan I don’t know everyone will survive everyone will survive bathe them out back with the hose and the dog they’re fine I’m going to the Super Bowl try it my mom has a phrase that I go back to all the time cuz I hate I don’t like people being mad

At me not a lot of people do and she’s like either they’ll get over it or they won’t either they’ll get over it or or they won’t and it’s like brilliant either they’ll survive or they won’t I don’t know you know I just kind of got to live my life because I might

Only have to deal with their disappointment in me a little bit I will have to deal with the disappointment in myself 24 hours a day and you might be thinking yeah but in this moment if I disappoint someone that will Loom so large within me it’ll be worse than me

Being disappointed in myself that I can like put on a shelf you can for now I’ll give you that you can put it on the shelf for now but one day that shelf is going to get real shaky cuz it’s stacked full of little jars of resentment little jars of

Breaching your boundaries and boom it’s going to come crashing down and you know what it’s going to look like martyrdom well guess you guys just didn’t want to invite me it’s going to look like drinking pills shopping cheating passive aggression snotty little remarks weight gain Frenemies the psyche will be heard and

What’s actually inside all of those jars is self load clothing that is the only possible byproduct when we put people chronically ahead of ourselves I don’t mean like every once in a while or like in a healthy way you’re like hey I die for my kid I mean you are chronically

Giving everything to other people but not to yourself we literally talked about this last time with the JLo video and how she had her little inner child who was like you loved everyone but me she’s like I’m sorry you could turn out like that where you’re addicted to love But it’s going to come out you cannot suppress it for long and self-loathing will manifest itself as self-destruction because that’s what you do when you hate something you destroy it and it just so happens that thing you’re trying to destroy is yourself wow when you look at it that way is it really

Better than if your friend is like well [ __ ] thanks for not driving me to the the airport like yeah sorry I’m sorry I can’t add another jar to the Shelf okay I can’t I can’t keep adding to this sorry and I learned that I learned that

The hard way because you know life as especially as women it it pulls you into the place of like guilt and you should pull up for everyone else and everyone comes before you and like I said that’s not in my nature to be like that and so

Even a little bit of that behavior and a few of those jars I was like whoa oh huh this is awful this is awful like my shelf got full real fast and it cracked almost immediately thank God thank God when people like oo a narcissist o a sociopath hey honey I have cracking

Shelves way ahead of yours and that’s actually healthier that’s healthier and again now that you say things like that to me I see you’re actually only interested in my compliance if you’re interested in me truly being the healthiest happiest version of myself you’d be like I love a shelf that cracks

Day one jar one don’t even look at that shelf it’s coming down that’s what I want for you guys I want you to have the shortest [ __ ] fuse in the world I want guilt to be something that you are allergic to allergic to don’t get that near me don’t get that near me

I’m allergic to that I’ll swell up I’ll get hives I want that to be an untenable thing that people bring to you no get that away from me mm- some people are fine with that I’m not fine with it what would happen if you lived your

Life like that what would you teach your children who would you help them become cuz look if you can’t pull up for yourself for yourself okay I get that this is a tall order like I honestly do could you do this could you like fake it fake casting off the guilt fake having

Your identity fake carving out time for yourself I mean you’re doing it but you’re like faking you’re faking it till you make it for your kids can you be like listen I feel terrible here at Barnes & noal but I understand in this roundabout way this genius this ageless YouTuber

Shon Lester taught me her eyebrows never look stupid Shon Lester taught me that in a roundabout way this is actually going to make my kids turn out better because they’re gonna have a strong independent person modeled for them and that’s what I want them to become I’m not raising kids I’m raising

Adults and this is also going to be better for them because of rupture and repair they’re going to see that Mom can be gone for 45 minutes life doesn’t end they’re fine eat your [ __ ] chicky tendies and your blue cup I want the blue cup kids in their cups I’m the same

Way I never grew out of it you know if you never have kids you never have to grow up it’s amazing you can be a kid forever you can be an insufferable horrible tantruming adult on that note I will bid you fa farewell I will bid you

Farewell I think that’s all we’re going to be back talking about I think Machine Gun Kelly because the [ __ ] is going on with him what do you guys think did you pick up on that when you read Blake’s caption if you’re a mom are you like no

That’s about right like I don’t leave my kids like ever why not why not and listen your reason could be like Financial like I get that it’s like I don’t have overnight Child Care like okay that’s that’s a whole different thing I’m not talking logistically I’m talking about

Emotionally or are you looking at Blake and you’re like this is weird or is just is this just one of those things where it’s like we probably don’t know the whole story cuz she’s a celebrity and she probably travels with her kids and and whatever it doesn’t matter it

Doesn’t matter this is just a jumping off point for us to have conversations about these kinds of things so good for you Blake I’m glad you’re out with your she’s got great abs four kids unbelievable and her beautiful hair I Love You Blake and I love all of you

Guys I will see yall later I’ll see you later shall Gators